EXTRA!

The Flat Tire Staff

KAILUA- Residents here were awakened early this morning by what many described as a loud "exclamation." John Smith of Kainalu Avenue was shaken out of his bed at approximately 1:34 AM by a rumble that disturbed much of the island.
"The dogs started barking and everything," said Smith. "It sounded like a sound I once made when I dropped a brick on my foot." Asked if he could determine the source of the massive groan, Smith said he thought it "came from the heavens."
Cathy Jones of Kuulei Road was outside on her lanai and managed to get a picture of where she thought the sound came from. "I was outside you know, having a cold beverage, you know it was hot last night, you know, and I hear this sound and I look up and I couldn't believe my eyes." Jones said she immediately picked up her camera and took a picture.
When given the photograph to examine, scientists at the NOAA declined to comment on whether or not the early morning "gasp" had anything to do with NASA's mission to crash a probe into the surface of the moon.