Just Another Day at the Ranch

On the road again,
Just can't wait to get out on the road-
Oh, hello!
Welcome back to the ranch pardner! Hope the trail was treating you right.
Mosey on over here and take a load off. I gots some stories to tell.
Got myself up at the crack of dawn and decided to go out and ride the fence line.
Beautiful day. Sky was clear and the birds were a chirpin, 'cepting for the wind that that was kicking up some dust, was a fine day to be out an about.
Took a little look see out at the far end of the property and lookee here!
What did I find but some Eastern fella testing out some new fangled flying machine:

He had himself all done up in some kinda harness and was looking to try and walk on water.
See here young feller, you don't mess with something that ain't broke!
Well I left him and his flying contraption and moved along.
Seems like them gov'ment boys been busy. Been a stretch of trail here been full of ruts and such and seems like it's 'bout time they done come by and fixed it up.
Gotta remember to ride into town and complain though, seems they left a heap of a mess to clean up:



It just ain't right leaving your broken down wagon wheels on the side of the trail. When you makes your livin off the land, you gots to keeps it lookin real natural like lestin it become just another scrap pile.
I stuck another piece o'chaw in my cheek and figured I'd just let it lie awhile. No use startin' up a feud over something like that.
Well the ole sun was a beating down on this ole brow something fierce, so I decided to head on back to the corral.
Sometimes it takes ride out into the pastures to clear a man's mind of all his troubles.
Well, well, seems we got some new folk about these parts:

Seems some homesteaders be taking up residence out on Spiffy Lane. Well, I wish them luck; it takes a certain kinda man to survive these parts.
I didn't get too far when the ole belly starts a complaining. Darn it! In my rush to get all saddled up, I forgot me some vittles.
Well I was creeping along near the marsh all slow like hoping to come across something for supper:

I come across some strange water creature that almost made me fall out of the saddle:

I had just got myself all settled again when something else just about made my eyes plumb near pop out of my head:

Seems like some new creatures come invading from over the border. In all my time 'round these parts, this be the first time I be laying my tired eyes on such colorful fowl. Then I remember something I done read in city papers about these birds:


It was getting along supper time, but those birds were so ugly they made a can of beans look like a side of beef!
Well, I gots back to the ranch just in time to see you mosey on in.
Can't stay? Not for a little?
Well, that's fine with me pardner.
You're welcome back anytime.