Premiere Anniversaire!

Okay, I'm a little late.
The one year anniversary of The Flat Tire was like two weeks ago.
I was trying to make it coincide with the two hundredth post, but that didn't work out either. I was going to just let it go, but I had this post sitting in the drafts section.
So here it is.
The Flat Tire One Year Anniversary Extravaganza!
Sort of.
What have we, the staff at The Flat Tire, accomplished?
Hopefully absolutely nothing.
Not in the Seinfeld way, oh no, not like that. I mean there is content here, I think.
Content? What content?
Okay, maybe content is a bit lacking.
Despite that, I hope it's at least interesting.
Okay, maybe not even interesting.
Let's try time consuming.
I like that!
The Flat Tire, the most time consuming blog in bloggerland!
Got some time to frivolously waste? Time that you can give and never have any hope of getting back?
Welcome to The Flat Tire!
We'll punch your ticket!
We are the black hole of bloggerland and proud of it.
The singularity, if you will.
Or something.
Or nothing.
Wait.
The singularity is nothing that becomes something.
I think.
I better go back and read A Brief History of Time again.
Anyways, all this sort of goes along with our mission of not having a mission. I mean we sort of had a mission, but that mission went out the door sometime around post number two. It was around post number two when we, the staff at The Flat Tire, discovered that it wasn't so easy to maintain a blog with a single related topic.
So we, the staff at The Flat Tire, sort of went askew.
I dig that word.
Askew, I mean.
Tell you the truth, I'm not even sure I'm even using it correctly, but I don't care cause I dig it.
Can you dig it?
Can you dig it?
Sorry, no more The Warriors references.
What? You've never seen The Warriors?
Oh man! That was only like the Greatest Urban Adventure Film(GUAF) ever!
Coming soon, a complete review!
So anyways, this being like one year and two weeks and all, I wanted to do something special.
Unfortunately, I got nothing.
Which is like having something, considering it's all about content and all that sort of thing.
I mean what do you call this?
This is content, right?
Don't answer that!
Here's the important part.
We, the staff at The Flat Tire, would like to thank you, the reader, for you loyalty and participation. Staying with us through thin and thin wasn't easy, I know, so we came up with this mission:



That's it!
Ain't it great?
Countless hours of brainstorming went into that idea!
I hope you enjoy the next year of The Flat Tire!
Tell all your friends about us so maybe we can start making some extra scratch with this thing.
Okay not really.
About the making money part.
The tell your friends part is real.
So anyways, stay tuned, for some exciting new changes are coming!
I know, I know.
I said that six months ago.
We're still working on it.
Hawaiian time, don't you know.