Sunday, August 14, 2011

Sunday Final: Womp!

Womp!
Womp womp!
Sometimes even womp! womp! womp!
It seems that today on my usual ride, I left my body at home and used someone elses body cause nothing seemed right on the bicycle.
Usually after a week off, I get back on and to borrow a phrase from my uncle, I usually feel like King Kong.
Melting asphalt and all that.
Today, the asphalt felt like it was melting and sticking to my wheels as each turn of the pedal was a chore and a half.
My nitrous bottle was empty.
So to speak.
Anyways, I gimped along watching my heart work out in the red zone and wondered to myself why I even bothered leaving the house.
Womp!
Womp! womp!
A while back, on one of these same kind of days, I noticed that on this two and half mile stretch I ride, there are a lot of sewer covers.
I don't usually notice them, but when the legs aren't there, these covers are a good excuse to stop pedaling.
A brief recovery period don't you know.
I believe I counted 77 covers, just on one side of the street.
That's seventy seven covers, some small, some man sized, in a two and half mile stretch.
I don't know what the city engineers were thinking.
Okay, some of them I can avoid:



I usually go a bit to the right.
As you can see though, there's not much of a shoulder here so when these womper things are like close to line, I haven't got much manuvering room.
Womp!



I can hear cars coming up from behind, so in this case I sort of have to grab my bars and womp! it.
If I think it's clear, I'll take the road and go around.
Womp! womp!



Then you got the double wompers.
Of course most times I'm going so fast they feel like one womp! but today was a fat burner day so it was two womps.
Womp! womp!
Or I could've gone a bit left and just got a single womp!
Decisions, decisions.
I'm not complaining you see, for on really good days I'm going so fast my tires barely touch the ground so I don't really feel them.
On bad days though, as I'm running them over, I sort of start to wonder what the hell these things are for.
Womp! womp!
Seriously, 77 of em in a two mile stretch?
I gotta run over 34 of them!
I counted today, since I was so slow.
That's 34 out of 77, not quite half, there'd be more if I was like lazy and just went straight and followed the white line.
Are these like vents so that the sewer don't blow up?
Inspection covers?
Bicycle obstacles?
I'm not sure.
Womp!
Womp! womp!
I was thinking maybe electrical conduit inspection thingys, but this is an older street and there are like poles on each side.
Womp!
I really don't know.
I admit though some days they're sort of fun to run over, other days not so fun.
They do give you a chance to rearrange your okole and change your seating a bit so they aren't that bad.
Sort of.
Womp!
Next time out, I'll count the wompers on the other side of the street.
Just for fun.
Womp! womp!

2 comments:

John Romeo Alpha said...

?
http://the.honoluluadvertiser.com/article/2005/Sep/21/ln/FP509210356.html

limom said...

That's a time a lot of folks around here would like to forget.
A generation of kids grew up with that construction being a fixture in their lives.
After that was done, they went to work around Flat Tire Central, remnants of that dig can be found in the early parts of this blog.
Seems we endured several lifetimes of cones and barriers.
It's all good now.
Except for the womp!